letters explained his grief, but she would never read...

ive been meaning to ask you, how life looks from the nosebleed seats....
shitty mood, shitty weather, shitty day. nothing to cling to either.

feeling home sick when im already home. interesting contradiction that exists. not sure where i belong right now.

*rolls eyes*

Current Mood: blah
Current Music: nothing

it's time to meet the concrete, and get it off your chest
home, but not much changes. sick of being used.....but yet im the accused when it comes to that subject. and always getting let down is never fun either.

but i dont wanna make it seem like ive had no fun since ive gotten home. its been pretty good. todays the only shit ass day as far as weather goes. blaaah. mothers day too. i hate it when im cooped up in this house.

"years pass, season change,
but i waited"

Current Mood: cold
Current Music: thunder outside is music enough...

never again...
so i went home for easter. wheewwww what an array of confusion, frustration, and damn good times.

horse the band, and fall of troy concert on friday was absolutely rediculous! zach ryan and i went, got punched in the eye, knocked in the stomach, and didnt even bother staying for Poison the Well. but i still had a blast. saturday night, just got drunk at my house w/ family / zach.....adam zach and i played for a little bit together. still excited about this whole band thing this summer.

www.myspace.com/lt3rock

....i scream on occasion haha

theres always one person who tends to ruin my at home experience. i think i just need to stop figuring out when she goes home, that way i dont get all fucking depressed when im let down, like always... might i add women in general suck?

Current Mood: awake
Current Music: new underoath...sucks you dont have it =)

>:-o
theres never enough fucking time in the day. i swear to god....

tony "tito" garcia and megan doyle are here. 757 <3

be jealous

Current Mood: giggly
Current Music: new taking back sunday demo's

:yawn:
and all these stupid silly songs,
keep trying to catch your ear.
i'm trying desperately.
it's just so hard to persevere,
and even if you listened
i never had much to say
cause it's the same old song
i've written for the day.

this band is amazing

easter is next weekend...first practice w/ LT3. rather amped about that.

fall of troy and poison the well next friday at the norvaaa

Current Mood: tired
Current Music: Cartel

oh god, so i thought wilmington was my second "home away from home", but now it seems like Virginia Tech/Radford Univ. are....the two school are pretty much synonymous considering there are like 10min apart.

but at any rate, ryan and i drove up to blacksburg, VA /Radtown, usa (lol) in an attempt to escape from the complacency of greensboro. met up w. my friends Titooooooooo (student and resident mexican of VA-Tech)...blaaaah boy did i have a fucking good time.

although, i must say, getting kicked outta a party when all your friends have already left and having no way home is not fucking fun. i planned on sleeping outside that night (in the rain)...aside from all that, it'd take too long to explain everything that went on, but you get the idea.

best part is, i'll be back up there april 22nd for quad fest

i think megan and tito are coming down here friday. oh jesus.

Current Mood: thirsty
Current Music: lagwagon

dedicated to my ultimate let down:
I'm never waking up again
so I'll never have to find out what you did.
Each day it's harder to pretend.
That your eyes aren't lying as much as your mouth did.

I'd grab your head by your hair and I'd hack it off.
And put it on display at the front of the yard
on a stick that's decorated with a little pink bow
and a sign that says "Her friends and family should have taught her more about love."

Dear Tragedy, I never had anybody.
But being alone wasn't half as bad as being obsessed
with a breath taker, a smile faker.
But these years alone have eaten me alive.

Recounting pages in a book.
That I'd torn out ashamed that one day you'd look.
Afraid that once you did you'd really know how it felt
to be a sucker on a string that you dragged around wherever you'd go.

I'm running around, around and it hurts.
Tempted to tape up the pages I'd ripped.
And although I recognize that we're attached at the lips,
you're the one in charge and that the captain's gotta sink with the ship.

Current Mood: drunk
Current Music: baysideeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

and although i recognize that we're attached at the lips...
over drafted my fuck account again. definite let down of the day, let alone i have to be at work in 90min.

everyone wants me to go to durham tonite to see some arena ice hockey game. cant do it. gotta fucking work. oh well.

....you're the one in charge and the captain's gotta sink with the ship

Current Mood: blah

fuck!

weekends over, time to start studying for tomm.'s spanish test.
had a good time entertaining some brit's last nite. seemed like everywhere i went friday nite, people kept coming up to me with the same question, "are you carson?" "ive seen you around whats your name?" hbahahaha i guess im just soooooo ~~popular~~

lol oh well

Got a single Silver Bullet
Shot right through my heart.
To prove ~~I can~~ survive,
Without you.

Current Mood: blah
Current Music: hawthorne heights (acoustic)

more bayside
another weekend is about to start....whew. hectic week. this is a much desereved break i think. kinda let loose last nite and got shitfaced at pete's...haha it was good to run into adam bolt. that fuckin bastard has gone into hiding. but he's living on tate street now so that should facilitate things.

looks like its gonna be rolling rock and a keg for me tonite =)

omgggggg i am over ecstatic about starting this band this summer with my brother and zach. cannot fucking wait.

Now I realize, I'd give anything I have
to walk a day in my old shoes.
Wondering what my first smoke would be like,
my first fuck, my next fuck up.

Current Mood: bouncy
Current Music: sorry, my new obcession is bayside

I hate myself, more than i ever let on, im burnt out...
im so overwhelmed right now with everything that has been going on as far as school. chances are im not gonna return back to UNCG next semester. my parents are pretty much giving up on sending me back here....probably has to do with my ~~amazing~~ academic achievements since enrolling here in fall 2004.

i fucking knew i shoulda dropped that god damn fucking class and no i have no way of passing it and no way of dropping it w/o recieving an F on my transcript. i honestly think my dad is gonna fucking kill me

"Pound my knuckles hard against the floor. My head against the wall, but I did this to myself."

Current Mood: sad
Current Music: bayside- blame it on bad luck

we're yelling through the streets, and im out of my fucking mind
love and drugs makes pupils get big

i loveeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee these people

let it ROLL baby roll.
this weekend had to have been one of the best times ive ever had...last nite was absolutely incredible. im so glad adam zach and jessi came down. sorry for not answering my fone last nite...haha. definitely had the most fun with those four people than i would have had at any party. omggggg

im making salisbury, md my second home. <333

saves the day and the doors...their music never sounded better, than it did last nite

Current Mood: ecstatic
Current Music: the doors

I've overheard it once
This has gone on before.
It's still one in the same
(We are accounted for)
We seem so far away from,
These things we used to know.
We seem so far away from everything

my brother, zach and jessi are coming tonite for the weekend. get ready!

I ~~never~~ told you what you were missing

actually, i have since day one, you just chose not to fucking listen

Current Mood: angry
Current Music: saosin

theres no explanation for the things i've failed at before
theres a fucking tornado spinning in my head right now. so many things on my mind, and im sorry if i had to let some things go. i didnt mean to, and nor did i do it to spite anyone, but right now i just cannot deal with some things goin on inside me. hard to explain, but i dont know any other way to put it i guess.

spring break was good. ventured through about 4 states in 5 days. maryland was by far the best time, i.e. thursday nite. saturday nite zach ryan karen and i drove up from salisbury, MD to ocean city for a HXC show, feat. scatter the fallen. pretty good.

oh yea, coming this summer < 3 ....you'll understand soon

Current Mood: indifferent
Current Music: amber pacific

words of wisdom
we make believe every day.
we make our lives seem like they're still worth living.
when we find out in the end,
it's only us that we've been kidding.

god i love bayside

sorry. cracked out on adderall. felt the need to post this

Current Mood: awake
Current Music: bayside

petes tonite. sorta buzzed already.

going homeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee tomorrow for the weekend. ryans tagging along. should eb fun.

finally figured out my password on myspace. jesus took me long enough. im missing emery. they;re playing tomrrow in winston. im sad. rock the fuck out

7FIFTY7 tomrrow.

<3 carson

Current Mood: drunk
Current Music: chiodos

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